Could not fall back to sleep this morning. So I decided to do some writing instead. As of late I am undergoing an internal process of change, one that has become painful. Funny how we seem to think that we have completely dealt with our own issues from the past. I am in no way saying that I need to live in it, however, to be completely free of any “baggage” that has remained, it must be acknowledged, addressed, and dealt with.

The word change is an oxymoron. Change by the very definition is a transformation or transition from one state, condition, or phase to another: the change of seasons. Yet change is the only thing that remains constant. It is one of the very few reliable constants we experience every day of our lives. Literally, everything will change, whether we like it or not. Most will try to control the change that occurs so it is always to our liking and specifications. Which is the ego running our lives. This will always lead to unhappiness and discontent, feeling unfulfilled with our lives.

I am not one of those people who can just let life pass me by without trying to be the best person I can be, or should I say at least trying to be better than I was the day before. Being that, to me, means simply being authentic and genuine. It is during these times when I feel most at peace with myself and everyone around me. As I stated in an earlier post it seems to me that I wax and wane from time to time. I think its human nature to do so. I also believe that its the Universes way of keeping us in check. After all, it will continue to place in front of you that which you have yet to learn, and will continue to do so until you do. We always seem to wonder why we continue to recreate experiences from the past…this is why. It will continue until we finally get it, and make a conscious choice to learn from it, and grow into our true selves.

With this process I think it must be said that there is and has to be a great amount of acceptance for those in our lives. I mean accepting all people for exactly where they are. This is not directed towards anyone in particular, but simply accepting everyone and how they choose to live and experience life. With this comes acceptance of our own selves and our humanness first and foremost. How can we accept another if we cannot accept ourselves? I am one who can be particularly hard on myself, which didn’t just happen over night. I too must accept myself exactly where I am, and trust in the Universe to guide me wherever it sees fit. I must allow, and I stress the word allow, this to happen, instead of forcing life. Life becomes so much more difficult, unfulfilling, and frustrating when we constantly force things, especially as it relates to our own personal growth.

I do not necessarily believe in spending my entire life to find, or define my lifes purpose. I do think however that we are guided to do certain things to contribute to the well being of not only ourselves, but humanity as a whole. We simply have to open our eyes enough and be willing to take on the challenge. Yes there are those who have a “calling” so to speak, but I do feel that has to eventually change to some degree as we never stay exactly the same. We are constantly growing and evolving, and with our experiences comes change. If we choose to close the doors placed before us, we then become stagnant in our ever evolving growth process. Those who choose this way of life, in my opinion, will always be unhappy and unfulfilled. Seeking a better life, happier life, doing the same thing they have always done without growing and learning will always produce the same results. This would be the Universe, yet again, continuing to place in front of you that which you have yet to learn.

© 2019